#MOTHERHOODxIndieChic // no. 8 - Kristen is an incredible momma of four kiddos (one set of twins!). She has been a business owner, and is currently chasing amazing dreams in the writing department. We know her motherhood story will resonate and make you remind you that every stage is chaotic and beautiful!

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I would say, “life is crazy right now”, but honestly, when has it NOT been crazy. I sort of think “crazy” should mean normal when put into a sentence with motherhood. Everyone has a different crazy, but nonetheless, it is all coo-koo for cocoa puffs…YA KNOW!

I have four kids. Stopping right there at that sentence would be good enough to most. “Whoa,” people say. "That is a lot of kids", people say. Yes, yes you are right. Four tiny humans. My kids' ages are 10 (in a few short weeks), 8 (in two months), 8 (yes that’s right…twins), and a 14 month old. You are probably thinking, hold the phone sister - that’s a 10 year age gap between your oldest and youngest. Yes ma'am, it is. So my motherhood situation is in a “stranger things” place right now. In a Target run, I hit up the sports bra/lingerie aisle and move right on over to the diapers and wipes. Lawsy.

Having three babies two and under was beyond stressful. It was both physically and mentally exhausting at the same time. I was warned that those days were “easier.” I am not going to say those people were right because nothing about those years was ever easy. But what lies before me and the taste I am being given now of "tweenager-hood" is big time stressful. I will take rocking that baby boy to sleep and changing diapers over the emotional roller coaster that is my 10 year old girl ANYDAY.

Tweens. What do I say? (Insert all the emoji’s). Haha. It’s special. Reeeeaaaal special. My almost tween is one of the sweetest children that I am pretty certain ever lived. She is funny, kind, and has a heart I can only wish to have when I grow up…one day. But we have gone from easy breezy, rarely emotional, to crying at the drop of the hat, slamming doors, wanting to cuddle all within a matter of about 13 seconds. I sort of feel like a bull rider. Just hold on for eight seconds and you’re the winner. One minute I’m playing peekaboo with the baby and the next I’m having a talk about your ever changing body! Everything I say is embarrassing. Honestly, it is more than both our hearts can handle. It is a season of life that came much quicker than I anticipated. I don’t feel prepared at all to “mother” this child…I mean tween.

When you become a mother, instinct sets in for most. Holding, rocking, loving and feeding come to you within seconds and it all seems to make sense. As if you had been practicing your entire life, right. But this season….different story. I honestly feel so awkward and inadequate to even go there with her on most issues. I mean let's be honest, are we not all still coming to terms with our own bodies? Here is this seemingly little girl needing to get wisdom and advice on issues that will shape who she is and I’m all like, ummmm….duh…doy…what? Deer in the headlights.

Moral of the story, moms - every season is hard. The babies, toddlers, school age, tween, and beyond. I can totally bet my mother would say my adult stage is even hard for her. Mothering is a gift, though. Sometimes it feels like a jack-in-the-box, scary, not so great surprise gift, but nonetheless - a gift. I have no real answers on handling these tween years. I am just going to hold on tight for my eight seconds and ride the bull.

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